the centerstage.

Stage fright is a state of mind. And if I could get past that trouble, the audience wouldn't even remember my awkward stance, my face or my shaking voice. But that was just what the guitarist said to ease the tension in the cramped backstage and, of course, my hysterics. What if I forget a whole chunk of verse? What if I miss a note? What if I fall off the stage? What if? What if? What if? The freshmen had arrived, noisy and excited in their seats, while I was a nervous wreck behind these grand, yellow curtains that could barely hide my frowning countenance. Some of the upperclassmen, who had graduated months ago, even came to see the event that we painstakingly organized. And the org officers were making last minute preparations, almost yelling their heads off while simultaneously wringing the president’s neck at having forgotten an important detail with the speakers. “Hey, you alright?” I couldn’t believe the violinist just asked me that. The question was unfair, and I couldn’t even work on a sarcastic comeback at the moment, which really said something about how unstable my current psyche was. It didn’t help when someone announced that we had less than 10 minutes before the program should start. I sneaked one last, fleeting look at the audience, sighing at that, a little disappointed suddenly. It still had me reeling, your decision to let go of your passion. And now, you were off to some inevitable family business trip. I let the curtains drop. A couple more minutes and your plane would be leaving, too. In the flurry of mute and hurried gestures, somebody chucked your cousin's celphone to my ear. You just had to call me right in the middle of this turmoil and apologize for missing this relatively important event. I would really want to hear you on that stage, you said. My heart throbbed painfully, the shifting agitation making me faint. You just had to displace the last of my sanity as well. Not a little later, the lens and that blinking red light of the videocam that your cousin was carefully holding served as your eyes. The notes left my mouth, and a promise was made that day.